” Not Nice ” Book Summary | Quick Reads for Busy Minds Epi 1
Welcome to “Quick Reads for Busy Minds,” a blog series tailored for the vast and bustling community of individuals with limited time but an insatiable thirst for knowledge. In each article delight, we’ll unravel the essence of a thought-provoking book, distilling its key takeaways into a concise 10-minute read. Whether you’re a professional navigating a hectic schedule or someone seeking intellectual nourishment on the go, this series aims to provide you with insightful summaries that capture the heart of each book, empowering you to absorb wisdom in a fraction of the time. Episode 1 of the series presents ” Not Nice ” Book Summary that unveils the secret flaws of being nice and how they affect our lives. Also the book gives out three steps to be taken in order to start being yourself and have people love you for who you are.
So grab a moment in your day, and let’s get started on this literary expedition together.
Today’s Book : “Not Nice” By Dr. Aziz Gazipura
” Not Nice ” Book Summary | Key Points
Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in being nice to everyone that you lose your own identity
Being nice does not come out of goodness or high morals. It comes out of a fear of displeasing others and receiving their disapproval. It’s driven by fear, not virtue.
Nothing terrible will happen to you outside the “being nice” model
The opposite of nice is not nice. It is a life philosophy that urges you to be authentic, honest, and just. That demands you stop putting yourself in the box of other people’s expectations and not adjusting your personality and life choices to the image people have created of you. It means speaking your truth even when it may be uncomfortable for others, standing up for yourself, and protecting your boundaries, even when it means saying “no” to somebody.
Being “not nice” is being true to yourself
It causes you to feel unseen by loved ones to whom you haven’t been showing the real you. Your parents don’t know that you disagree with several of their core values because you’ve never told them your views. When they say they love you, you can’t help but feel this is a lie because they don’t even know you. They see the image of you that you have shown them because you want their approval
Make a conscious decision to establish your boundaries and go after what you want
To be free of the niceness eage, you must take three steps:
1. Decide not to be nice: Breaking out of the niceness cage is a conscious decision. You have to make up your mind to stard up for yourself, self, say what you want, and enforce your rights
2. Do the “not nice things that you usually are too shy to try: It is not enough to convince yourself you want to do these things, you have to do then. You should list all the not-nice things that would help you become more authentic
3. Work through the internal backlash afterward: After you do these not nice things, you will inevirably feel guilty. You only know this way, it is all that you know. Do not allow these thoughts in your head from years of social conditioning to break your resolve.
If you consistently follow these three steps, you will become more assertive, confident, happier, and authentic.
Learn to protect your boundaries despite what niceness social conditioning tells you
You’ll he surprised that more people will take it is stride than would get upset when you say no. More people would say “okay,” and find an alternative. Understand that it is okay to say no when you don’t want to and, cant . This method is the ultimate definition of protecting your boundaries. To say yes is a choice, not a prerequisite.
Final Takeaway | ” Not Nice ” Book Summary
We all consider niceness a good thing, but it’s one of the worst things we practice. The conclusion isn’t to say that, in context, niceness is a bad thing. The problem is how we’ve gone about practicing it. Practicing being “not nice would make you assertive and decisive while remaining kind. ” Being “not nice” isn’t the same as being mean ; it simply means refusing to curb your true self to be accepted or loved and doing the best for you.
Get the book here , https://amzn.eu/d/31pwiW6
Read also : 5 Best Books to Enhance Your Communication | Boost Your Verbal Prowess https://thebrightdelights.com/5-best-books-to-enhance-your-communication-boost-your-verbal-prowess/